Sea Stories: Extreme Home Makeover - Cap'n Pat

14 Feb 24:

Cap'n Pat lived in a house attached to the boatyard, his bedroom overlooked the road that ran past the rear of both building. A neighbour who lived in the house on the opposite side of the road to his bedroom, would often return in his car late at night after a drink at the local pub. The entrance to his garage and parking area (originally a stable in the old days) was through a narrow gap in an old stone wall. Invariably, it involved a lot of manoeuvring to line the car up well enough to pass through the narrow gap, 

Cap'n Pat was a light sleeper who usually went to bed early, so one evening, he decided enough was enough, he was not in the mood to have his sleep disturbed any more. He got out of his comfortable warm bed, put a dressing gown over his pyjamas and slippers on his feet, stormed down the stairs and out of his house straight to the boatyard, where he picked up a sledge hammer. Suitably equipped, he matched around the rear of the boatyard towards his neighbours house, where his neighbour was still attempting to line his car up with the gap in the wall. Cap'n P dressed in his nightwear and slippers, immediately started to demolish one side of the wall, making the gap a good few feet wider, he then turned to his neighbour, who was sitting in his car looking on in amazement, and said "Perhaps you can get your ********* car through the ********** gap now!" He then returned to his bed and a peaceful night's sleep.

A few days later, he was told by an official to rebuild the wall, which he reluctantly had to do, but he never had a disturbed nights sleep afterwards.

(********* = Sailors cussing words, not suitable reading. )

Cap' Bilge Rat.

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Another story Cap'n Pat told me himself.

He signed on to join the Royal Navy as an Officer in WW2, when it was announced that the war had ended, he packed his kit bag, walked down the gangplank and headed for home. I queried that, because I thought enlisted men all had to wait to be discharged. He said "I only signed on for the duration of the war and the war had ended, so I went home."

Doug 

Sea Stories